These 3 Things Transformed Our Marriage

Being married is pretty much a sleepover with best friend every single night. Yes to pillow fights, cookies & milk, and late night Harry Potter movie marathons – (yes #nerdalert here). I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – people focus way too much on the wedding and not enough on the marriage. But that truly is the best part! It’s not easy though, I’d be lying if I said it was. The good news is that there are certain things you can do to help your marriage succeed – these are some of them.

Related: Here’s  Why The First 6 Months of Living Together Are The Hardest

DO MORE

One of my favorite quotes is “if you keep score, you both lose”. In fact, I love it so much that I keep it on a letter board in our house. Doing 50/50 will never work in a relationship because the truth is that 50/50 isn’t enough. One of the things that I’ve learned is that being in a healthy marriage means that you are in a true partnership and that means picking up the slack for the other and developing a culture of giving. The problem with 50/50 is that that if you define your relationship in terms of fairness and equality then your partnership soon turns into a contest with scorekeeping as a priority. 

Related: Why 50/50 In Relationships Isn’t Possible

GO BIGGER

If you can manage it, king beds reign supreme. Cuddle time is great, but only for a little while. Getting a bed that gives you the space to go to your side allows you to rest easy. Even better? A mattress that supports your lifestyle. I try not to work when Sahir is home which means that it’s either when he’s away or when he’s asleep that I get most of my writing done. Our new Leesa Hybrid King Mattress allows me to stay up and work while he can head off to dreamland without me. 

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How the magic made? We have a king mattress on an adjustable bed frame that’s split between two twin XL sections. This means I can adjust my bed up or down separately from Sahir’s side. It also serves as a secret weapon to keep the other person off your side, but mostly that hasn’t been working in my favor since I’m always creeping onto his side whoops.

TALK IT OUT

What’s one piece of advice that everyone will tell you? “Wife is always right” and that’s a bunch of baloney. Do I wish we were always right? Heck yah. Are we really? No. What’s more annoying than being in a fight? Feeling like your partner doesn’t care enough to share their opinions with you and just says “You’re right!” Ugh. Don’t Patronize Me. We want to be right on our own merit and not just to end a fight. Encourage your partner to share their opinions with you and be respectful when they do.

Related: 9 Phrases That Have No Place In A Relationship


This post was created in partnership with Leesa. Sahir and I absolutely love our mattress and recommend it with pride. Thank you for always supporting the brands that support Simply Sabrina. 

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